“Who you marry… is enormously important in determining the happiness in your life and your success and I was lucky in that respect,” says Buffett.
When someone who is hot tempered, marries someone who is hot tempered; there will be endless fights, misunderstanding and lack of peace, unless they address the triggers of their anger, be careful when addressing trigger topics and they both seek to listen to each other.
When a male chauvinist marries a feminist, there will be a clash for power and to demand respect; unless they both step outside of self and they realised that they both are important and special and need each other, demanding of love and respect. Love is not a gender battle but an independence of mutual gains.
When an impatient man marries an impatient woman, they will both give up on the love; unless they both realize that growth is a journey, they are both on a path to being better and the best things in life come through teamwork and bit by bit effort.
When a hurt person marries a healed person, the hurt person will bleed on the healed person leading to more hurt; unless the hurt person takes personal responsibility to heal and be whole.
When two people with different definitions of what love is and different values marry each other, there will be frustration and feelings of being unloved; unless they both see love from the other person’s view and custom-make their love according to each other’s love language.
When someone who is ready for marriage marries someone who is not ready for marriage, there will be feelings of being used and regret; unless the one who was not ready grows into valuing marriage and stepping up to full commitment.
When someone who is a perfectionist marries someone who is a don’t care, there will be conflict and feelings of being pushed on the side of the don’t care partner and feelings of stagnation on the perfectionist; unless the perfectionist gives an allowance of not being controlling and the don’t care partner sees the value of order and planning as they both assign roles and responsibilities based on each other’s strength.
When a person with high sexual libido marries a sexually rigid person, there will be feelings of sexual frustration and abandonment on the one with a high libido and feelings of sexual disgust or objectification on the rigid person; unless they understand that intimacy is beyond sex, the one with the high libido takes care of the emotions of the spouse whilst seeking to give pleasure that both will enjoy, and the rigid one relaxes and becomes more confident with emotional, physical and sexual intimacy.
When a shy man is married to a shy woman, some conversations will never happen and communication will be hindered, leading to loneliness in their marriage; unless they both come out of their shell and choose to relate.